Rizky Business

Pregnancy

2010-02-09T19:19:00.000-08:00

This is pretty much different for everyone and from what I understand, can be different for the same person between different pregnancies. All I have to go on are stories from friends about their pregnancies, which are pretty much all over the map. I do think that the single underlying truth about being pregnant is that it is your first and immediate introduction into the world of "my life/body doesn't belong to me anymore".

This is a phenomenon far beyond just having to give up drinking, full contact sports, or following all of the other various CDC prescribed dos and don'ts. You are sick without warning, you are exhausted without reason, your lactose intolerance vanishes, your gums begin to recede from vitamin deficiency - all because every single function in your body has involuntarily turned its entire attention away from you and is now completely focused on providing for your child. This is true whether you are prepared for it to happen or not, and there is absolutely no recourse.

So the original statement: "my life/body doesn't belong to me anymore" is not meant to be a complaint. It is merely an observation that I think somewhere along the way in each woman's pregnancy is realized to one extent or another. Even if you have the best first trimester known to humankind, at some point you will hit a wall of exhaustion in your second trimester, or be unable to catch your breath from the constant push of a tiny foot directly into your sternum during your last few weeks.

Now there are many things I think a woman can do to that will go a long way to mitigate these occurrences, which is the ultimate point of this topic but that is all they are...diversions from that ultimate reality, which is perhaps better put: "this is not about me anymore." So without further musing, my most core and basic tips for pregnancy, which I do hope others will feel free to add to and comment on.

1. Stay hydrated. I traveled a lot when I was pregnant...up until the last moment the airlines would physically let me get on a plane. The absolute very first thing I did as soon as I got to my hotel each time was buy 2-3 of the largest bottles of water I could find. I think the need to stay hydrated was more apparent to me while traveling because finding myself in a situation where there was no water readily available just was not an option. Without water I quickly became weak, dizzy, and disoriented - defeated by the needs of my child, who took his share first and left me with whatever might have been left over. A best practice in daily life, a complete necessity in pregnancy. I think this is also a good example of what I mean by "my life/body doesn't belong to me anymore". Clearly I went about my daily life and accomplished some really amazing things, personally and professionally, while I was pregnant. Its just that I was able to do those things because I maximized my physical and mental ability to achieve by proactively counteracting the tendency toward being physically, emotionally, and mentally exhausted by following these general rules/tips.

2. Snack away. This was also a necessity for me. A rapid drop in blood sugar is no laughing matter when you are pregnant, and far more difficult to recover from than it might be in other situations. Granola bars (especially Luna bars...yum and lots of vitamins), peanut butter crackers, apples, raisins, and whatever else I found that would fit in my purse were replenished at almost a daily rate. As long as you are healthy snacking, weight should not even be a momentary concern. If you feel yourself begin to power down, it is because the baby needs more, and fast!

3. Stay (Get) in shape. I don't think this has anything to do with what kind of shape you are in before pregnancy, or how much weight you might gain. The fact is that labor and delivery are the most physically demanding activities you will ever go through. Being in shape doesn't mean jogging 3 miles a day until your 8th month, especially if you weren't doing that pre-pregnancy. But simple strength exercises, light aerobic, and especially pregnancy yoga are invaluable assets to your body during labor and delivery and can be done even if you not in great shape to begin with. A focused mind, the ability to re-direct and handle stress, and a strong, prepared body will provide you the best labor and delivery experience you can possibly have (note, I did not say "good experience"...just better than if you are stressed and physically drained before you even experience your first contraction!). It may be easy to ignore this one, but it is important to think (not worry, just think) about what you might expect from your mind and body during l&d and apply yourself with as much dedication to achieving that level of mental and physical fitness as you can. Keep in mind that labor and delivery is quite hard on your child as well, and after all, "this is not really about me anymore"!

Re-engage, re-engineer

2010-02-08T20:05:00.000-08:00

I can draw a pretty definitive line between my last post here and my first log-on to Facebook. Since this served primarilly as a way to keep people informed about my pregnancy and the subsequent development of the resulting child, a function now pretty much subsumed by FB, I have not had any need to keep up with it. My poor time management skills also lead to FB as the perfered mode of communication since it only takes 2 seconds to type in a status.

It is a sad fact that although I am over two years into my parenting journey, I still lack the ability to incorporate personal/leisure activities into my life that require any significant amount of thought. This is something I will have to continue to work on and I hope I can write about more at a later date.

The reason why I decided to re-engage this blog was due to writing what was intended to be a short contratulatory email to friends that just had their first child. I just couldn't help but offer a small bit of perspective and advice as part of the congratulations, especially given that they recently moved across the country and although they may have developed friendships with other couples who have children, I could only suspect that they are may not be well established and thus my desire was to let them know that "I was here for them if they needed anything".

Of course, any time that a situation like this arises, I find myself reminiscing about pregnancy, childbirth, and the first few weeks of motherhood. All are experiences that cannot be adequately explained or prepared for, and are deeply personal experiences that, at least in my case, tended to swallow pretty much my entire being. Reflecting back, I continually find myself aware of two things: 1) I did not ask for help as often as I should have, and 2) I have been continually supported by those who have provided me assistance when I needed it but did not even realize it enough to ask. I feel indebted to those who have been so generous to me, and have shared their wisdom and resources so freely, even though I remain almost entirely a "I can do it myself" type of mom. I have always appreciated advice from other mothers, I just don't know very well how to ask or what to ask for.

So that is the story of why I am thinking of re-engaging and re-engineering this blog. I'd like to chronical my thoughts and advice (rambling as they may be at times) not for the Facebook crowd, but for the small but growing circle of moms that are friends who I may not have the privlidge of talking to on a regular basis. In exchange, I'm hoping I can gather and chronical advice from those who are blazing the trail before me. I think it would be a nice experiment to see if we can exchange information that we may feel comfortable sharing with each other, but don't really have another mechanism to do so other than individual emails to each other. In that sense, I hope everyone reading this feels invited to post whatever information they see fit to share with me or others, solicited or unsolicited.

I have some previous thoughts and whatnot written up for other reasons in the past that I will probably post to start off with, and we will see where that takes us.

Good Riddens to February

2009-02-26T10:39:00.000-08:00

So pretty much everyone knows that Adrian was sick for pretty much the entire month of Feburary, culminating in a hospital stay for treatment of double lung necrotising pneumonia. I remember Jenny Cruz visiting Chicago (the first day Adrian got sick) and I remember yesterday. Everything in between is complete jello.

It was amazing to see how Adrian flurished in some areas even when his physical health was declining. Although he developed a very healthy fear of doctors, he also kept his unwavering joy and determination to move past whatever it is that was keeping him down.

He also has a a new cousin to look forward to meeting, Wyatt, and I'm looking forward to watching them entertain each other while I kick up my feet and try to rest a bit.

From Adrian was so sick in Feburary :-(

Mother Earth and Father Time

2008-12-23T09:33:00.000-08:00

I rushed home early from a business trip last week, fortunately touching down at O'Hare just as the snow started coming down. Unfortunately, I wasn't so lucky at avoiding the 10mph traffic on the interstate and my usual 45 minute trip turned into almost 4 hours. I couldn't have been happier, however, when I finally made it through the door just as Adrian was getting ready for bath and bedtime.

Occurring only a few days after Adrian's first birthday, I was reminded of the treacherous trip my parents, brother and future sister-in-law made the weekend after Adrian we left the hospital, braving terrible winter conditions on the toll road just to be able to visit the newest member of the family, and bringing with them a full meal and lots of hugs and kisses. I tried my best to convince them to turn around, just as Shahir tried to convince me the other day not to worry if I didn't make it home before bedtime, but something compelled me to defy the weather and spend the last few moments of the day with my son, playing and laughing and nodding off to sleep.

Mother nature has a way of reminding us of how fast time flies and I hope all of you have enjoyed watching Adrian grow up as much as we have, either in person or through this blog. Happy Holidays everyone and if you are lacking in good cheer, click below!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!

Another video of Adrian

2008-11-13T19:56:00.000-08:00

Walking is so old news! Now that we have conquered complete mobility, he can finally start focusing on all the other fun things life has to offer like claping and such!

Walking

2008-11-02T08:57:00.000-08:00

Sorry for the brief hiatus. I let a friend borrow our camera but you should all thank that friend because I got his camera in return, which takes much better videos than my cell phone!
I wish I had the time to write a full entry, but if a picture is worth a thousand words, hopefully the videos will be worth even more.

Walking

Playing with Max and mom

Playing with Grandpa Steve

Movers and Shakers

2008-07-15T20:31:00.001-07:00

Welcome to the world of baby gates and outlet covers! Adrian is officially on the move after a week or two of scooting around the living room backwards. Sorry again for the quality...one of these days we'll have to get a real video camera!

Spring update

2008-05-04T06:12:00.000-07:00

So there hasn't been much to talk about for the past month or two, but right on cue with the changes of spring, Adrian seems to be changing before our eyes. He's discovered toys, rolling over, pulling hair and the power of his legs. He likes to stand up (with some assistance of course), to be tickled, and to eat anything he can get to his mouth.
Yesterday was a big milestone; his first shot at eating "solid" food. We started with oatmeal cereal and I was sure Shahir poured WAY too much. But Adrian took to it right away and after a few bites I thought perhaps we were done. Adrian said NO! I want more! And he proceded to eat every last bit of it and even try his luck licking the bowl.
Of course we captured the fun in pictures and thought they were so cute we had to post them here. They are also on our picture site (link on the left). Enjoy! We hope to see you all sometime this summer!

Happy Baby

2008-02-28T19:44:00.000-08:00

Adrian is growing like a little monster. He's moved from the 5th percentile for weight to the 50th! I'm happy to report he is a very happy baby indeed and he seems to have grandpa Steve's laugh (the "clicks" in the background are not due to poor video from my cell phone, they are actually part of the laugh).

Month one - off and running (soon)

2008-01-25T09:09:00.000-08:00

The first month of parenthood is already disappearing in a cloud of dust behind us. Thought I would share some more recent pictures. I think some have been bypassing the blog entirely and going straight for the pics. Good thinking, because I update those more frequently than I do the blog. Feel free to stop by anytime.
http://picasaweb.google.com/ms.rizk

Adrian changed a lot in the first month, but it that was nothing compared to the current daily rate of change. When in utero I frequently felt that he was itching to get out ASAP, and that turned out to be quite true. These days he seems to be most frustrated by not being able to move around on his own and I half expect him to be crawling within the next month...he seems to have a determination that can only be described as "Stephanie-like".

I can now add blogging to my ever expanding list of things I can now do with only one arm (making sandwiches for lunch and sweeping the floors are two of my greatest achievements). Until next time...

Video - First Christmas

2007-12-30T23:42:00.001-08:00

For those who haven't seen the little man in action (and those who can't get enough). Enjoy!

Welcome Adrian!

2007-12-13T10:07:00.000-08:00

I'm happy to take a few minutes from my motherly duties to announce the arrival of Adrian Shahir Rizk. Most you likely recieved an email from Shahir yesterday with the specifics, but I have the pictures ;-) You can access the pictures scrolling below at this link: http://picasaweb.google.com/ms.rizk/Adrian121207 and hopefully there will be many more to come soon!
Adrian was 5lb,10oz at birth, 19.5 inches long and born at 5:31 am. He's been very well behaved for the past 24 hours although my father is quick to remind us not to entertain any thoughts of that lasting forever!
P.S. Now taking submissions on ideas regarding the cosmic repercussions of having our firstborn on Rami's birthday!

No baby yet

2007-12-09T09:05:00.000-08:00

Everyone seems to be waiting for big news, but the only news I have is that there is no baby yet! The anticipation is killing you all, I know, but nature must run it's course and I am not officially due until the 19th. Even then, it is only a guess and the majority of first-timers are late.
Never fear! The baby seems healthy, kicking normally, progressing as expected and will surely be here before the new year. Even though I'm in the process of recovering from a kidney infection (a typical problem in late pregnancy), I'm actually feeling very good, well adjusted mentally and physically and ready for the new phase ahead of me. Shahir seems to be feeling the same; we are very much enjoying the peace and relaxation of our last few childless days. We have become quite a good team over the past 6.5 years, and feel prepared to forge ahead.

And no, there is no name yet!

Baby Shower #2

2007-10-26T19:53:00.000-07:00

Believe it or not, I am already 32 weeks, which means technically I am considered full term in just a few more weeks (week 37). I think I'm almost ready, thanks mostly to my fantastic friends and family! The house is now filled with swings and strollers and car seats and CLOTHES. Lots and lots of clothes - which is good because the fewer times I have to do laundry each week the better.
Here are a few pictures from shower #2. I will also post a link to the "family friendliest" version of our photo shoot a few weeks ago.

Third trimester - joys and pains

2007-09-28T20:59:00.000-07:00

I am now officially in my third trimester which is a big reality check. Lots to do before baby gets here! From what I understand, the major growth spurts are over - from here on out baby just packs on the pounds. Its a good thing, because the kicking is fairly constant and sometimes quite intense, especially at night when I'm trying to get to sleep.

Shahir and I had some photos taken last weekend by a friend who is quite a good photographer. I will post a few here and maybe post some others later. I'm only going to get bigger from here!

The jury is in

2007-09-06T19:59:00.001-07:00

This is my first official foray into that time honored tradition of parents embarrassing their children by proliferating naked pictures of them. Our ultrasound today revealed that we will be having a boy in December! The technician was nice enough to give us the most impressive and definitive angle possible, and you can only imagine how proud Shahir is already ;-)

Everything else looks great, we got to see pretty much every major organ and body part and got to see the blood pumping through the heart and through the umbilical chord. It all seems to be great. I forgot to ask if they could estimate the size right now, but from what I've read HE should be about 2.5 pounds by now...big enough to have a very good chance of survival if anything unexpected happens.

I also had my first baby shower last week. Rania (Shahir's sister)

organized a surprise shower for me while the family was vacationing in Florida last week. It was a lot of fun and the first time I can remember anyway that someone threw me a surprise party!

Well, I guess the big news is out of the bag so I'm having trouble imagining what else I will have to report over the next few months, but I'm sure there will be a lot!

First two "sightings"

2007-08-25T07:15:00.000-07:00

I've now reached the "preganancy sighting" milestone (where a complete stranger feels confident enough that I am actually pregnant to mention it somehow). In fact, I had my first two within one day. The first was Thursday night when I was walking Max before heading to bed. A passer by asked if I was pregnant and how far along (answers: yes, and 6 months). Then on Friday afternoon on the way home from work I grabbed the bus and ended up standing since it was pretty packed. About half way home a soman tapped me on the shoulder and asked if I wanted her seat. I said I was fine and her friend gave her kind of a strange look. The first woman said "Well, she's pregnant," and the second woman peaked around me and said "oh yeah! I couldn't even tell from the back."
So those are my first two "sightings". Shahir is out of town this week and has my camera. I tried to take a few pictures with my phone but they didn't turn out so good. I'll see if I can get something better to post within the next few days. Rambo seems to be doing pretty good - moving around more and more, and I'm moving around less and less! So much to look forward to!

Rambo MacGuyver it is...

2007-08-06T18:53:00.000-07:00

Some of you may have heard of Shahir's favorite name for the baby, Rambo MacGuyver. He says this will be the name if the baby is a boy. I say, if we're going to name a kid Rambo MacGuyver, why bother with worrying about gender?

At any rate, Shahir's name has turned out to be right on track. The kid has lived up to its name over the last week or so, when those interesting little flutters have turned into a full scale attack on my internal organs. And to think those little feet are going to get probably 2 or 3 times bigger before December. Goodness.

Well, here is a picture of me from earlier today. It only gets exponential from here!

Nobody puts baby in the corner...

2007-07-11T19:03:00.000-07:00

Storage is at a premium in our 1 bedroom apartment, so when I saw this set on craigslist for less than any one of the pieces would cost seperately, I convinced Shahir we should grab it while we could. We picked it up on the 4th from a family who - despite the fact that they lived in the north suburbs - was very nice and ended up giving us a few bags worth of other stuff they didn't really need anymore. One of the first pieces of advice my friend Meagan gave me was "don't turn down ANYTHING someone tries to give you for free!"

Shahir said "It feels like this stuff has always been in here" the day after we brought it home. I have to admit...it does seem like it must have been terribly empty before.

Things are going well. Feeling much better these days. My next (and probably last) ultrasound should be in about 4 weeks, when they will be able to get a peek at whether it is a boy or a girl. Its hard to believe I will be hitting the half-way point within the next two weeks. I'm still not really showing yet, although I expect that to change pretty rapidly. I already find myself lamenting pictures of myself before I had to buy a whole new wardrobe...

You can check out those and other photography gems at my flickr account, which I'm sure will be filled with baby pictures before we know it!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/endlesslywaiting/

They grow up so fast...

2007-06-14T15:57:00.000-07:00

The number of pants I fit into is quickly dwindling, so I reluctantly went shopping in the maternity section the other day. I say reluctantly because I'm barely showing, but that doesn't change the fact that I only have one or two pairs of pants left in my wardrobe that I can even begin to think of wearing. So I'm trying on half the maternity section and as I grab the things I've decided to buy and bend down to pick my purse up off the floor, my pants split right down the seam. So even though the girl at the checkout counter asked "would you like a gift receipt for those?", I guess they were pretty timely purchases.

I'm somewhere in my 13th week now, which means I'll officially be in my 2nd trimester in just a few days. We had another ultrasound today to check for birth defects and everything looked perfect. The baby was very cooperative...didn't move around too much and seemed really calm. Shahir is hoping that is a sign of things to come!

Baby's first mug shot (profile)...

First Post: About this Blog

2007-06-03T08:09:00.000-07:00

By now I'm sure the announcment has spread far and wide that Shahir and I are expecting in December. A friend of mine suggested that I do a blog, since we have family everywhere from New Mexico to Egypt. I'm not very good at blogging and its not something that I will probably do very often, but I will try to update whenever there is news, so everyone will be able to get the information from the source.

Today's blog will be about the top 5 things people ask me:

1) How do I feel?

I'm tired. I'm tired all the time. I haven't been sick, but I don't feel very good either. I feel like I've had a 4-week long hangover.

2) Was it planned?

I admit that I have a reputation for being super-organized, but some things I prefer to let unfold naturally and on their own time.

3) Is Shahir excited?

Yes, he is very excited to have a quiet, well-mannered, reasonable baby in the house ;-)

4) Are you going to find out if its a girl or a boy?

Probably. I haven't thought about it much. Although I think Shahir's mom might have an embolism if I don't find out so that's something I should probably keep in mind.

5) Do you have names picked out?

No. I'm guessing that sometime over the next 6 months something will come to me or Shahir that we both agree on. If not, I guess we'll cross that bridge when we come to it!

Baby's first picture: 7 weeks